Welcome To My Blog

Ever wonder what it's like to be in that moment between struggling artist and published author? Read on and find out.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Platform Builder Challenge

           The first challenge of the Writers Platform Building Campaign is here and I have met it. The challenge was to write a story that began with "The door swung open", ended with "the door swung close", and was 200 words exactly. And this is my contribution:

            The door swung open.

            My children poured into the den.

            “We made friends with aliens from space,” said Lucy. “Can we invite them to dinner?”

            “How’d you know they’re from space?”

            “Because their ship landed in our back yard.” Max rolled his eyes.

            “And because they said so,” Lucy added.

            I scanned their faces for signs that this was a joke. No giggles. No furtive looks between them. They had to be kidding me.

            “Real space aliens could be dangerous.”

            “Not any more. We made friends with them.” Lucy smiled big.

            “Do you think it’s a good idea to have aliens in our house?”

            “It’d be cool, Dad.” Max nodded. “They have disintegrator guns.”

            “I like them,” Rick and Nick said simultaneously.

            “We’re supposed to be nice to people we meet.” Lucy reminded me. “If we’re nice to them - they’ll be nice to us.”

            I had taught them the Golden Rule. Besides, there weren’t really aliens in our back yard.

            “Sure,” I told them. “Let’s do our part to further interplanetary relations.”

            “Hooray,” they shouted.

            “Randy,” my wife called. She sounded nervous. “Look outside.”

            I reached for my children. They charged out of the room.

            The door swung shut.

           That's it. Hope you like it. Please head over to Rachelle's blog to check out all the other entries.

Rach Writes    http://rachaelharrie.blogspot.com/p/writers-platform-building-crusade.html


  1. Ha! Great pictures swirling in my head of over-zealous kids pouring outside a moment before the gripping panic of realization snags their parents! ~ Nadja

  2. This is such a great idea for a children's book! Loved it!

  3. All right! Love the whole idea of aliens, and the dialogue was spot on. Great job!

  4. LOL. So fun. I love that you used so much dialogue. This is a fun read and kids would love it. I love your voice. :)

  5. I like it, especially since I'm still not positive they are aliens. I mean they could just be really crazy neighbors. I'm #72

  6. What a fun story. Who doesn't want a space ship in their backyard? I mean, really. ;)

  7. This was fun. Love the wife's line and the fact we get to imagine what's facing them :-)

  8. sweet alien story!
    if they have disintegrater guns, i hope they're friendly =)

  9. Oooh, awesome! Wonder what they're getting themselves into! Good job. :-)

  10. Ha, a fun story. Ahh, the innocence of kids - of course making friends with aliens wielding disintegrator guns seems like a fun thing to do.

  11. Ahh, this was great! The story moved right along. I started to suspect maybe there were really aliens in the backyard when the kids weren't giggling, but I still wasn't sure. The dialogue seemed smooth, and you have likable characters here. And I loved the wife's last comment. Well done.

  12. I loved the lightness until the wife calls. Nice I enjoyed reading.


    9 kids?? Oh my!!

  13. Ha! That was great. You got the children's voices so well.

  14. Great entry! I'm in your campaign group and looking forward to getting to know you! :)

  15. Hey! You've been shortlisted in the first level of the challenge! You are now being considered for Round 2 of 4!

  16. I've been shortlisted? That sounds painful. Is it anything like being black listed? Ha. Just kidding. Wow. Thanks for the update. How very exciting.

  17. Hey everyone. It appears that I'm not as familiar with my blogger controls as I should be. I accidentally deleted some comments. (Mostly my own.) I'm sorry. It absolutely was not intentional or a reflection of anyone's posted comment. I really appreciate all of you following me and taking the time to leave comments. Please continue to do so and I will keep my hands off the evil comment controls.

  18. Lol, this is so creative and cute. The last two lines had me cracking up.

  19. Haha - this was great! Very different from everything else I've read. I want to know if they're evil, or good or if they're going to use those guns!